Thursday, March 27, 2008

Advances in Hotpocketry

Before I was married, I ate a lot of convenience food. I've been eating very well for the past 7 years, only eating frozen foodstuffs in a pinch....such as when I'm doing shiftwork. I was working with the Navy today, and was trying to hold off to the end of the day without only food options were crap, and I didn't think ahead to pack a lunch. Walked by the snackbar a few times, and only saw a few options...frozen PB&J, Jimmy Dean frozen breakfast sandwiches, and Pepperoni Pizza Hot Pockets. Every time I see a Hot Pocket, I'm immediately whisked back to my youth...these things, along with Taco Bell, got me through my teenage years. My only issue with Hot Pockets as a convenience food, is that they're really not all that convenient. The pocket wasn't really a pocket at all, it was a sleeve. This design flaw made eating the Hot Pocket tricky. You couldn't eat with your hands, as the molten sauces (known as 'the hot') would penetrate the pastry shell, leaking out the bottom of the sleeve, causing 3rd degree burns. Meanwhile, you're eating a frozen piece of brocolli, chickenstuff, or other parts of the hot that didn't ever thaw out. I always had to put my Hot Pocket on a plate, thus making it less convenient. It looks like the folks at Hot Pockets have solved this problem with their patented Qwik Crisp (patent #4775771, #4780587, #4948932).

The Qwik Crisp has a folding bottom piece that turns the sleeve into a pocket. As I ate my Hot Pocket, none of the hot dripped onto my hands. I also got an even cook on the first cold spots. I can't say it was a tasty lunch, but it held me over a couple hours. Hopefully I'll remember to pack a lunch next time.


Jon said...

Louis Winthorpe III said...

I used to like Hot Pockets. But then I read the nutritional information on the side and I've never had one since. If I remember correctly, there is like 20 g of fat in the flavors I used to eat.

I find looking at the ingredients/nutritional content is a sure-fire way not to eat something again. I've never eaten at Chipotle after reading that the veggie burrito has 1400 calories (with the topings I used to add, such as sour cream).

Strap said...

i could never give up the chipotle...too good. really, the calories aren't too bad if that's your big meal of the day. if you ate one everyday, washed it down with a bucket of coke, then got a tub of ice cream'd have a problem.

hot pockets have no nutritional value.

Louis Winthorpe III said...

I had a friend who did not know the calorie content of items at Chipotle... He used to eat there regularly and weighed a hair more than he'd like. When I told him, he said to me "that would explain a lot." And now he doesn't eat there very often anymore.