trying to stay in shape

So, I've started my treadmill and spin bike workouts. It's pretty damn boring, but I've managed to work pretty hard. My only goal is to not let Jon Laurion be faster than me in either running or biking.

The side effect to these stationary events is that there's nowhere for the sweat to go, other than to soak in my clothing and drip on the floor. This problem is compounded by the fact that the workout gear I'm required to wear was not designed for one to actually wear to workout. It was designed in order to provide for maximum reflectivity, which is more important than being physically fit. The shirt is not breathable, and it gets slimy when sweaty. The shorts also have a very high chafing coefficient.

Al Jazeera Commercial

This commercial is always on Al Jazeera...saw it after lunch yesterday. It took me by surprise...not something you want to see after a low quality meal.

So cool...

There are no pockets in the shorts, so I needed the manpurse to carry all my mandatory items...

Fossilization

2 days in the desert now, and some fossiliferous masses are building in my nose. Yesterday was hot and sandy. Today was hot and sandy. I hear tomorrow will be the same.

Fuckdamnitshit

Ok...when you're deployed, you usually get nice "I miss you daddy" kind of videos sent to you. Well...here's what mine have to say.



Any suggestions on how to correct this behavior? Please send to Sonya at shlindsey@gmail.com

Any criticisms of their behavior or bad parenting? Please send to my brother, Ryan at rml20052001@earthlink.net

Burritos, Coolness and Social Consciousness

Just got back from Baltimore. Since I'm a white guy, I was searching for a good microbrew, but never saw one. Thought for sure the whitest part of Baltimore would be full of them, but apparently not. So, the power of Chipotle drew me in for one last giant burrito. The decor of Chipotle hasn't changed much in the 2 years I've been in Hawaii. But, it looks like they're trying to create a hip new image. First thing I noticed was the receipt which has the quote "Farms, not Big Pharm". Then I started reading the tray lining. It was full of band names and musician names written in a spiraling fashion. I've never really listened to a lot of these bands, but have heard of a few of them like Elvis Costello. Some of the bands are so hip, I've never heard of their names. The guy who designed that wrapper must be extremely white...so white he uses a MacBook Pro rather than the standard MacBook I carry.

Hot Dog Vending Machine

Just saw the most amazing invention...a hot dog vending machine. Never saw one of these before. Too bad I ate a huge breakfast, else I would've bought one. May do it later just to see how it works, but I really don't want my last meal on US soil to be a hot dog microwaved inside of a vending machine. So in order to lear more, I did the next best thing and googled it. A Ukranian genius living in Maryland invented the thing...the machine can carry 600 dogs and 300 buns. So after 300 dogs are prepared, are the remaining 300 sold bunless? Or is the bun optional? You can read more about it here.

Team Time Trial

Competed this Sunday in the HI State Team Time Trial Championships. I was on a 4 person team in the mixed category. The team came together at the last minute, and we didn't have the time to train together, so we were aptly named the Slacker HACCers. Despite our lack of specific training, aero equipment, ample warmups and good pre-race rest/diets, we performed extremely well. The day before the race, I hiked Mt. Olympus, ate a giant burrito, drank 4 beers and ate a ton of chicken wings. The female member of our team, Spring, was out until midnight at the Jack Johnson concert. The other Steve showed up just minutes before the race and wasn't warmed up until the last couple of miles.




They didn't offer pre-race prostate exams as this time trial.



Our final time was 1:04:17 for the 40km...somewhere around a 23mph average....good enough for 2nd in the mixed category. Unfortunately the race wasn't on a closed course and we came to nearly a complete stop just when we were putting the hammer down on the return leg. That caused Jeff to pop off the back, and severely disrupted our momentum. So that's our excuse for not winning...

Mt Olympus

Yesterday we hiked Mt. Olympus. This was a challenging 6.5 mile hike. The end was pretty tough, with a near vertical climb on steps carved into red dirt. Ronnie K and I did the whole thing. Sonya took Carter and Jack up a couple of miles...pretty impressive for the little jocks. Carter got to test his new camelback.



The view at the top was impressive. The end was a small patch of grass on top of a vertical cliff overlooking windward Oahu on one side, and Honolulu on one side. It was fairly clear, with constant clouds rolling over the mountains. During the clear times, I could see nearly everything from Kailua around to the airport. It took about 3 hours to do the hike, and it was pretty tough with a lot of up and down action, and a few technical sections where I fell on my ass. Hard to believe that Sonya and Ronnie K did this in the pouring down rain 2 weeks ago. It was bone dry yesterday and I still fell.



Ronnie K learned something today about good pre-workout nutrition. Hot Dog Musubi powered him up the hill...not the best idea. I opted for fruit and the cookies Sally made us.

Trail Running

Over the last year or so, I've done a lot of races (cycling, triathlon, running, rolling around in mud), so much that my wardrobe is full of participant t-shirts. It's not like I'm kicking ass in these races, rather they've allowed met to stay down around my scientifically determined air force approved weight. The best by-product was finally getting max score on my pt test, thus giving me a couple days off work and an offer to have my photo placed up in the gym...thought that was too cheesy, but part of me regrets not getting a mustached photo up in the gym.

Now that I'm going away for 6 months, I'll need a target to train for. I'll miss the cycling racing season, but will be back to hit a few running races before winter sets on in Hawaii. I've been eyeing the inaugural XTerra Trail Running World Championships for awhile. For the first year, you don't have to qualify for entry...perfect for an underachiever such as myself.




I went out for a run Tuesday on the Aiea Loop Trail to see if this is an attainable goal. I'd planned on doing 1 trip around the 4.5 mile trail, but decided to go back for another. It was pretty tough, since it's been awhile since I've ran on a trail, or hills for that matter, but it was a lot of fun. 3 days later, I'm still pretty damn sore. I look forward to hitting more trails when I return. In the mean time, I can balloon up on chow hall food for a few months...then start running in August.

Mustache...at 2 weeks

Day 13

Decided this afternoon to go ahead and get my haircut 1 day early. Also, trimmed the beard down to a goatee...next step...mustache!

Little Dr. Phil

On our way out to hike on Sunday, Sonya purchased an apple bran muffin from McDonald's. She immediately realized this as a mistake (anything from McDonald's other than a McGriddle is a mistake), and said "this tastes like shit".

Carter's response:

"Mommy, why do you say shit? That makes me want to say shit. Don't say shit."

We've decided to not say shit.

Another Montage

You can never have enough montages...Carter wanted his own.

Peacock Flats

Yesterday we went to Peacock Flats...a 3.5 mile climb on the North Shore.

Sonya ran.

Ronnie K walked.

I meandered with the boys...only made it up 2 miles.

Montage

Photo Shoot

Sonya and I went out to dinner last night...had a great meal and time at the Pineapple Room. Beforehand our neighbor took some photos of us. Here's one...looks like a post-special olympics victory celebration. Not sure what's going on with my toes.

Saturday Ride

Did my last North Shore ride before I leave town next week. Since I was only planning on 48 miles, decided to ride hard from the beginning. Flew up Kole Kole, and nearly puked at the top. Even hauled ass down Snake Road. I think I finally found the secret to a decent descent, since I changed cassettes from a 12-27 to a 11-23...that extra gear really helped on the down hill. At the bottom of the hill, a few of us got pulled over by a cop...that was a first for me. Rather than writing a ticket, he gave us some tips for safe riding. I got the gist of his message, which was basically "protect yourself from these crazy hawaiian redneck drivers", but really wish he could give the "drive safe and respect bike" message to a few cars, by citing them for wreckless driving. Anyhow, at the bottom of the hill, took off pulling another rider at a steady 27-28 mph for the next several miles. After the waterbreak, I got a flat...let everyone else go, hoping I'd catch someone on pineapple hill. This gave me an extra bit of motivation and made me work harder. Eventually I caught a rider near the top of the hill. I was spent, and I had to limp back to the car.

This song sums up the day...Jon should've fixed my flat. That's all I have to say about that.

Beard at 1 Week

I haven't worked in a week...have another week off before my trip, so no shaving until next Thursday. I've also let my hair grow the longest it's been in 7 years. You could say I've been trying to get in touch with my inner hippie while I can.

Working Out

Skipped the normal Thursday bike ride to take the boys out for a little workout.

New Calendar

Today I got a Thirteen Moon Peace Calendar for the White Lunar Wizard Year. I ordered the calendar from the Foundation for the Law of Time last November, or shall I say during the Overtone Moon (totem animal: Peacock). These are fairly popular, as they have been out of stock for the past 5 months. Yes, the calendar is almost all the way through the year, but still has some use. (It starts in July, or the Magnetic Moon, totem animal: bat). Now I have the benefits of a 13 moon/28-day calendar that is a perfection of harmony that reflects and is synchronized by the synchronic order...a purely fourth-dimensional order of reality.



The calendar is full of good info and tells me how to cast the daily code spell and provides details on the tones and radial plasmas of the body.

Ronnie K's Room

First, his wardrobe...



...and he wonders why he has trouble falling asleep.

Tantalus

Rode the Tantalus Time Trial yesterday. Like every other time I've rode this hill, it rained. I'm beginning to not like this hill, not because it's a difficult climb, but because it always rains and the roads suck. Climbed the 4.5 mile hill in 25:11. Not sure what the results were, since I didn't stick around for awards, but I'm pretty sure my race was good enough to put me in the middle of the pack. I'd like to think I could do better, maybe if I rode this hill occasionally, or had I skipped the Jack in the Box earlier in the week...maybe those 3 beers and a cream puff weren't the best meal the night before a race.

The ride down the hill sucked...it was rainy and cold. I could barely see in front of me due to being pelted in the face with rain. Road conditions are horrible with loose gravel everywhere.

Here I am at the start, getting my pre-race prostate exam.

Life's lessons.

If I learned one thing by watching lots of movies in the 80s, it's that there are 2 types of people...jocks and nerds. We all want to be jocks, as it is the jock's mission to torment the nerd.

Carter has proven himself quite the jock this week. He hiked 5 miles on a tough trail earlier in the week. Today he biked 4 miles sans training wheels while Sonya ran. Today he's solidified his status as a jock. (We know he's not a nerd, since he can only count to some number called "other teen". ) Once he made that declaration, it was time for him to torment his first nerd...

Deadly Combinations

7 x jalapeno poppers from Jack in the Box
1/2 peach-mango pie from McDonald's
1 cup coffee

Eat in that order at 1am...see what happens. It's not pretty.

Tired

Things that suck:

1) Exercises
2) The Navy
3) 10pm-10am work shifts
4) Ass kissers
5) The smell of hot pockets and folgers at 3am
6) Being sore because you entered a push-up contest in order to keep yourself awake on the night shift, even though you haven't done a single push up in 6 months you decide to crank out 420 in a span of 3 hours trying to catch up with some Army guy that does push-ups every day